Full of nothing!

I have never felt this empty. I was just lying there in bed and i never felt this empty, So full of nothing!
I just got done with 2nd year finals a day before and I should be celebrating but all i can think about is 3rd year books and instruments and teachers and schedules and groups and i feel so dismantled. I was wondering if I'm the only one who was thinking so much into it and why the hell is everyone else so fucking calm.
I felt so lonely, felt like i had a shortage of friends! everyone i know is busy hooking up, getting married or doing something or the other and here i am just doing nothing!
I think I'm going to die alone watching football or complaining about it!
When the hell did life get so fucking complicated.I'm still in shock. Someone get me out of this state of shock. I need to prepare myself for more unexpected turns coming my way. I should have known better than to assume that it was all coming to a settlement for all of us.
I’m not laughing anymore. I’m so so afraid. That’s totally new to me. I'm totally new to me =(