3 words that became hard to say. I and love and you

Every bit hurts.. Every part of it. You never promised anything but i believed in forever, i believed in promises, i believed in love. It's been so long and i've tried to give myself to someone who loves me more than you ever could but you hold me back. I blame you for ruining me. You played with my head and you screwed with my heart. I love you but i want to be happy like you and i want you to be miserable like me.